Battle Of The Absolute Equals is a new SB4MC feature that seeks to definitively rank and compare two indistinguishable films. Unless otherwise noted, each of the following figures and statistics is accurate per film.
- Number of humanoid robots, of the type in question: lots
- Number of humanoid robots that we give a shit about: one
- Number of aspects or attributes that makes this particular humanoid robot special: none
- Sexiness of robot plus nakedness of robot divided by ultimately revealed uselessness of robot, each as expressed on a zero to one scale: two
- How often we ought to worry that technological advancement is both inevitable and the gateway to an emotional or physical apocalypse: constantly
- Protagonists who initially don’t believe that the robot is bad news: one
- Somewhat more compelling secondary protagonists who know the robot isn’t good news and must struggle to convince our initial protagonist: one
- Cool scenes of the robot doing markedly inhuman humanoid robot shit all by themselves: one or two, whatever, they both do that at some point
- Instances of the robot getting totally owned by some much more primitive robot, one that has a single function such as washing dishes or pressure-flattening industrial components: one
- Hectic warehouse crescendos: one
- Triumphs of our essential humanity over our nihilistic thirst for futuretech, at least for now: one
FINAL SCORE: THESE ARE SORT OF THE SAME MOVIE
But did Harlan Ellison sue the producers of Cherry 2000?
ZomboZombo? Crap, either the auto-fill just kicked my ass, or I spontaneously spawned an evil twin.
THESE ARE SORT OF THE SAME COMMENTER