Nightmare Alley: Book Vs. Movie
Come on in, and let’s watch the geek bite the head off this chicken…
Still Bourne
I’m actually fairly disappointed that’s not what this film is called.
Star Trek Beyond: Who Mourns For A Story?
A movie so stuffed with whiz-bang your whiz-banger will cease to whiz and bang.
Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country – Dopey Movie, Perfectly Good TV Episode
The send-off of the original cast dreams it’s a movie, but belongs on TV.
Green Room: In Which Punks Do Not Feel Lucky
I hope to remember to avoid being killed by neo-Nazis, attack dogs, box cutters, or red laces.
Jaws 2 vs. Michael Myers vs. Jason vs. a Helicopter
Jaws 2 will keep you entertained for for a couple of hours, especially if you like sharks, sharks eating teen-agers, helicopters, and sharks attacking helicopters.
Hunt for the Wilderpeople: an Antipodal Tonic for What Ails You
Hunt for the Wilderpeople shows up with little to prove, and proves it anyway, exactly unlike any of the sequels or reboots that have been crowding cinemas of late.
Ghostbusters 2016: Dull, Dumb, & Dispiriting
Cast whomever you like in this thing–women, men, moose, crustaceans, four neatly arranged piles of gravel–it’s still terrible.
The Evil Dead, Raimi’s Original Shovel To The Head
Watch you don’t get possessed, now.
Le Mans: All Action and No Story
If Steve McQueen racing around in a 1968 Ford Mustang in Bullit’s single chase scene is great, then a whole film built around McQueen, fast cars, and racing should be mind-blowingly awesome, right? Right?
When We Were Kings & The Greatest, In Which Muhammad Ali Plays Muhammad Ali
How great is Muhammad Ali? Let him tell you…
The Wraith: An ’80s Tale of Fluffy-Haired Revenge
Who is he? Where does he come from? And, most critically, how does he keep his hair so damned fluffy under his helmet?
Swiss Army Man Is Mostly Corkscrew
It is, after all, a film about a flatulent corpse. And probably the best one you’ll see all year.
The Unending Horror of Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein
This is the worst film I will never be able to forget seeing.