What Not To Watch: The Stuff
Need a movie not to watch? Look no further! The Stuff is gloopy, delicious, and very, very bad for you.
The Fast And The Furious: The Original. No, The ORIGINAL Original, From 1955
It all began a long, long time ago, in a movie so fast, so furious, you’ll forget you ever saw it.
Safe: Todd Haynes’s Allergic Reaction To The 20th Century
A movie that makes you vaguely uncomfortable with absolutely everything.
Furious 7 Gets Completely Untethered
Where we’re going, we don’t need roads.
The Car: Best Jaws Rip-Off Ever
Forget about grizzlies, piranha, squids, orcas, and giant ants. Nothing is more terrifying than Satan’s Lincoln Continental.
Experiencing Star Trek – The Motion Picture The Way It Was Meant To Be Seen: On TV With Commercials
Turns out the then-most expensive motion picture in history was meant for the small screen.
White God Increases Your Risk of Heartworm
Mongrel monster movie White God (Fehér isten) wants to have it’s kibble and eat it too.
Going Clear (Around the Bend): Scientology and Your Alien Overlords
What you already know about Scientology, explained, by Alex Gibney and HBO.
So Many Movies to Not Watch
Having a hard time deciding what not to watch? Please allow Stand By For Mind Control special correspondent MC Frontalot to help you out by watching many movies he — and you — should keep clear of your optical sockets.
Kill Me Three Times. Please.
Kill me as many times as it takes to prevent me from having watched this flick.
The Salt of The Earth: Wim Wenders Doc On Photographer Sebastião Salgado
Go for the amazing photography on display. Stay for the amazing photography on display.
A Brief Stab at Friday the 13th
Friday the 13th is as gelatinous as baby poop and marginally less endearing.
It Follows: The End Is The Beginning
A new indie coming of age film you would be unwise to dismiss as merely about sex and teenagers and monsters.
An Honest Liar: Feats of The Amazing Randi
An entertaining new documentary on the king of the debunkers.